


Impossibly, Perfectly Correct

by TonightNoPoetryWillServe



Category: Temeraire - Naomi Novik
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-26
Updated: 2020-12-26
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:46:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,214
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28334856
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TonightNoPoetryWillServe/pseuds/TonightNoPoetryWillServe
Summary: "Everything about Captain William Laurence is impossibly, perfectly correct—from his mode of address to the tie of cravat. Somehow, he even manages to keep his clothing perfectly pressed as they cross the Himalayan wilds. It looks exhausting. Tharkay wonders idly if there’s anything underneath the polished veneer."Just a little drabble that wouldn't leave me alone. Steals dialogue from cannon.Warnings: cursing, slight reference to suicidal ideations, unbeta'd.
Relationships: William Laurence/Tenzing Tharkay
Comments: 4
Kudos: 46





	Impossibly, Perfectly Correct

Everything about Captain William Laurence is impossibly, perfectly correct—from his mode of address to the tie of cravat. Somehow, he even manages to keep his clothing perfectly pressed as they cross the Himalayan wilds. It looks exhausting. Tharkay wonders idly if there’s anything underneath the polished veneer.

The cracks show soon enough, and he’s relieved that the guise of the gentleman does not mask cruelty, as is the case for so many Englishmen he’s known. In fact, the emotion Tharkay seems to glimpse most often is the genuine affection Captain Laurence has for Temeraire. It’s clear that he loves the dragon deeply, and that the dragon loves him.

As time goes on, Tharkay realizes that his crew loves him, too. Loves and respect him—a rare balance. Roland teases him, and grumbles over the studies he insists she complete. Granby berates him for not taking care with his own safety, and trusts his orders implicitly in moments of crisis. He holds them all to a high standard, and they are the better for it. 

Perhaps Captain William Laurence really is a decent man to his own people—a warming thought, but Tharkay knows he’s still far on the outside of that particular campfire.

Seeing the veneer crack fully as Laurence tells him to go to the devil in Istanbul is validation. And it is terrible, to see the suspicion on Laurence’s face and know there is justice in it. But then Laurence follows him through the sewers anyway, trusting that he will not be led astray.

When Laurence extends his hand, Tharkay takes it. He trusts Laurence to keep his word. The man really is a gentleman, through and through. 

***

Even the way William Laurence commits treason is fucking perfect. It is for the most noble reason imaginable, to prevent the slaughter of an entire species. And of course, he comes back to turn himself in afterward. 

Tharkay would not have believed it possible that Laurence would hold his own conscience above even the demands of his duty to the British government. And he can see immediately that making such a choice has broken Laurence’s heart. 

Laurence doesn’t even bother to flee the building burning down around him, despite the unlocked and unguarded door. As if Tharkay needs any further proof that he would die for his honor. In that moment, Tharkay would do anything to save this man’s life—even lie to him—but thankfully he does not have to: he has the letter from Admiral Roland giving him permission to take Laurence back.

“I might never have found you, of course,” he says later, more so that Laurence will know his own heart than the reverse. Laurence would never flee what he sees as justice. He still believes that the name _traitor_ is a stain, when all Tharkay can see is a good man. 

He has known for some time now that Laurence isn’t just good to his people. Laurence is simply _good_. Tharkay only prays he will survive his choices, and vows to be there at his side as long as necessary, even if that means following him halfway around the world.

As it turns out, that’s exactly what it means.

***

Laurence deciding that he will _always_ follow his own heart, not just in the most extreme of circumstances, is the most perfect, most _beautiful_ thing Tharkay has ever seen. 

_“How do you bear it? The choice, and all the consequences thereof, alone?”_ he had asked Tharkay, and seemed to take some solace in his answer, abandoning his mission of cruelty against Napoleon's irregulars and damn the consequences.

But this man has lived and breathed duty all his life. He cannot so easily undo his conditioning. Aboard the _Allegiance_ , he draws into himself. His eyes rarely stray from the sea, and Tharkay cannot help but wonder if the only reason he does not throw himself over the rail is the pain it would cause Temeraire.

One night, as they sit in his quarters sharing a bottle of wine—Tharkay's insistence having surprised Laurence into accepting his invitation—Tharkay asks, "Is it your conscience that troubles you? I am no expert in the matter, but perhaps giving voice to your troubles may ease them."

Laurence is silent a long moment, and then replies, "I have lost the trust I once had in outside authorities, I feel... adrift, as if I am at sea without a sextant or even the stars to guide me. I have no regrets, but I still do not know how you bear it, the loneliness of it all."

"I find... that I am not nearly so lonely as I once was," Tharkay answers softly. When Laurence looks at him in some surprise, Tharkay gives him a wry shrug. If the admission can help Laurence through this, he’ll consider it cheap at the price. "Not every decision need be made wholly alone. There are many whom you might appeal to for council—some might even be worthy of it. But it is true that in the end we must own our choices, so I can only hope that you learn to trust yourself as Temeraire trusts you... as I trust you."

"I do not know if I am worthy of such trust."

"You are."

Laurence's blue eyes grow simultaneously softer and more pained. For a moment, Tharkay is lost in them. 

Before Laurence leaves his room that night, Tharkay asks to be called by his given name. It is the first time in weeks he has seen Laurence smile. As the days wear on, the smile returns with more regularity. Tharkay watches as Laurence puts himself back together again, knowing that takes effort, knowing that he will be all the stronger for it. Laurence’s conscience is a far better guide than any government. There is no one in all the world Tharkay trusts more.

But Tharkay has to admit the truth to himself: he is not here because Laurence is a good man. 

***

Everything about Will is always impossibly, perfectly correct. And that must mean that the kisses he trails along Tharkay’s cheekbone and the glide of his hands along Tharkay’s body, that this too must be correct, and right, and perfect. 

“I beg your pardon if I am too forward,” Will murmurs against his neck. 

It is every dream come true, and even as Tharkay’s cynical nature flares up to protest that he cannot trust this affection, he silences it with the knowledge that this is _Will._ The trust he has in this man is a fundamental part of him. As he has eased Will's loneliness, so Will has eased his. 

“I daresay you are not forward enough,” is his reply, as he captures Will’s lips and pulls him down to the ground. There are a million stars overhead in the Australian outback as Tharkay explores every line and curve of Will’s body, a map to be treasured always.

Later, as they lie in a tangle of limbs, Will mumbles into his hair: “I hope we will one day have the opportunity to do this in a bed. I must apologize for choosing such an unfortunate location to make my affections known.” 

Tharkay laughs. “It was perfect. You're perfect." 

Will's answering smile proves it to be true.


End file.
